"I'm Only Saying This Because I Care...."

So after a week of burnt porridge, a surprisingly nice homemade (by me) pea and ham soup and another 6 mile Moonlit Marathon training walk, I was feeling relatively confident when I stepped up to the oche (and by oche I mean scales) I was stupidly disappointed because I’d only lost half a pound, she may have well told me I’d put 5 on, because I was genuinely gutted! It just feels at the moment that my weight loss has really slowed down and nothing I do seems to kick it into action. Now I’m a realist (apart from the fact I genuinely believe one day Matt Goss and I will marry) so I know I’m in my Slinky mission for the long haul, but I could do with losing slightly more than half a pound! Still I’ve upped my gym trips and am trying to vary what I eat to see if that helps.

  I want to give a quick mention to my friend Terry who sent me this video yesterday and it really set me thinking. This is the video of an American news anchor called Jennifer Livingston who received e-mail from a listener telling her she was fat.

  Whatever possessed that man to take the time to write in, is beyond me, it takes time to sit down and write a letter or an e-mail and also this man was writing to a woman he’s never met about something that doesn’t concern him!

  It always amazes me, just what people think they can comment on and they then justify it with “I’m only saying this because I care” or “I’m not being nasty, but” 

Someone I used to know had an array of insults, which she'd say in a seemingly nice way, touching your arm gently, loading up her slur and pulling back the sling of her verbal catapult sending a shower of rudeness into the ether. 

My top 3 favourites (and I have to say they weren’t all said to me)

1. When are you going to make an effort with your appearance? I’m not being funny, but you’ll never meet a bloke unless you start dressing up
2. If you don’t hurry up and have a baby soon, your ovaries will shrivel.
3. You’ll probably die alone (said to a friend who was perfectly happy with her life, has a good job and lots of friends)

   Jennifer points out in her video that this man saying that she’s fat is not a surprise to her, it’s not anything she doesn’t know. I know there are certain conditions where people look in the mirror and they don’t see what everyone else sees, but generally when you’re fat and you look in the mirror you see a fat person staring back. Sometimes you’re not sure how that happened or when you stopped being the 20 something year old that could eat whatever they wanted and never put on an ounce, but they're there staring back at you.

  Some people have very different approaches to trying to “help” fat people, I’m sure we’ve all had a friend who has thought they’ve been helping by saying one / possibly all of the following

·       “Should you be eating that?”

·       “ I’m pretty sure THAT’S not allowed on weight watchers”

·       “If you just ate less, then you wouldn’t be so fat”

·      Do more exercise”

·       “If ever I feel like I’ve put on a couple of pounds, I just cut out bread for a few days”

Some think that by actively squeezing one of your body parts that will help. I remember meeting an old friend for lunch, as were sat having a coffee, she reached over grabbed my tummy and said “well you’re obviously content, because you’ve put a bit of weight on”.

  I’m glad Ellen shared Jennifer’s video with the world, because Jennifer is spot on, she was being bullied and she shouldn’t have to put up with abuse from anyone. The man that took the time to write that e-mail must be absolutely perfect. I’m assuming he has no spots on his face, doesn’t wear glasses or walk with a limp. He probably doesn’t have a speech impediment, he’s probably not going bald and trying to hide it with a combover, he’s probably the perfect specimen of a human being and therefore highly entitled to write such words, because he has no idea what it's like to have a hangup about anything, so it's not his fault really!

  We all have things we don’t like about ourselves and wish were better. I’d love Jennifer Aniston’s legs and Emma Willis’s ... (actually I’d just like to be Emma Willis) but I’m sure Jennifer Anniston would like my boobs and maybe Emma Willis would like my nose, but we work with what our mama’s gave us. So today, look in that mirror, blow yourself a kiss and tell yourself every inch of you is fabulous!